General Stuff (ongoing)

General Stuff (ongoing)
  1. People like noise. Noise serves as a distraction to us because we’re all afraid of the silence that it takes to conjure up an original thought or two.
  2. Laziness is a fucking disease.
  3. Nobody gives two fucks about you. Self-consciousness is a nasty product of an overactive imagination. Destroy that social construct.
  4. Questioning authority, questioning religion, questioning culture, beliefs, the system – is normal. Having an inquisitive mind prevents it from idling. Keep yourself sharp.
  5. Jumping from one sentence to another is confusing and exhausting. Gotta know how to stop and take a breath before you talk.
  6. Social anxiety. Deliberate.
  7. When done right, confrontation is a road to closure. That should give you the peace of mind you’re looking for. Stop letting your emotions simmer and get the best of you.
  8. The world doesn’t like any of us much and it rarely operates the way you want it to. Embrace failure – or at least give it a pat on the back.
  9. Fear is a bitch. It’s a weak ass bitch that forces you to succumb. The more you give in, the stronger it gets.
  10. Hearing vs listening: know the difference.
  11. Stop pretending to know things if you don’t. Asking questions lead to way more interesting conversations.
  12. All talk and no show makes you a laughing stock.
  13. Quality over quantity bitches.
  14. Indecision is a decision – a lousy one but it’s still a decision.
  15. If all else fails, recognising that our existence is inherently meaningless should provide us with that one last positive outlook in life.
  16. Lying is the sleaziest thing you can ever do.
  17. “The deeper you invest in others, the more you lose out on yourself”
  18. Sometimes you gotta let out your inner Thought Catalogue fangirl. Give her room to indulge a little.
  19. Sleep. Water. A walk. You’ll feel so good.
  20. Learn how to fucking manage your time and stop slacking.
  21. Acknowledge your privilege and stop whining about it. If you hate it so much then use it to give back.
  22. Social media is disgusting sometimes.
  23. Everyone has daddy issues, you’re not that special.
  24. Optimists exist for a reason – similarly, so do pessimists so “would you like a refill?”.
  25. Racism is normalised in our society – so much so it’s difficult to catch yourself saying something racist until much, much later.

 

Daily one (sometimes two)-liners. 

Smoke and Mirrors

I’m sitting on black wisps of smoke with my eyes closed. 

I smell the singe of thick, burning locks permeating the air; whispering their silly mantras like saccharine hisses caressing my ear. 

My body sways gently to the crackled melody humming from underneath my bottom, lilting experimental choruses; thick with distortion. Soothing. 

A smile creeps. Not from the smoke, not from the music – but this roller coaster jerking up and down on weathered tracks, it keeps me alive. 

Because who knew one could find a fucking pinprick of light inside this void? Even with her eyes closed.

I’m overwhelmed by the mess in my life but underneath all this disgusting clusterfuck, I’m happy. That’s it. 

Niche

Find your niche.

Stick with it and begin your journey. Create.

Mould it into art and nurture it with your mind, body and soul.

One day, when you have polished away the last remnant of its flaw with your bare, calloused hand, it will be ready.

The world will marvel at its beauty, its complexity, because this is where your heart is. You live in this creation. Only you.

Only you will be able to tell the stories that come with the scars, the little imperfections, the quirks of this masterpiece.

Only you will appreciate the entirety of this creation.

Only you will be able to see it as it should be. The vision that comes with, while some may empathise, can only conjure their version of your reality.

Only you can create this.

So savour it and take it all in.

Find a niche and begin creating. Every day.

 

2016 Favourite Reads

Burned Alive by Souad.

This book depicts the terrible cruelty of honour killings and the questionable practices present among certain tribes. Written in a first-person POV, this book shares the journey of Souad, a woman from the West Bank who was burned alive by her own brother in-law but escaped death thanks to Jacqueline; a European humanitarian, who nursed her back to health.

The book is split into two parts; Souad’s and Jacqueline’s. The first and major part was that of Souad’s story, where she described the horrible conditions that women were subjected to live in. They were considered “less than animals, because animals bring profit and women bring nothing but trouble” – a paraphrased quote from Souad’s own father was enough to establish the cruelty women endure on a daily basis.

The language used was fairly straightforward and it didn’t take me long to finish but it was mostly due to the story being so… intense.

Sadly though, this isn’t a true memoir and it’s undetermined whether the content is fictional or not but I loved it nonetheless. It opened my eyes to the horrific practices that are still prevalent in some parts of the world. It made me more aware of the different cultures and how they interpret and practice religion. A good read if you’ve got a few days to spare.

You can find it on GoodReads here.

Crank Trilogy by Ellen Hopkins

This YA trilogy tells the story of Kristina, a crystal meth addict. She is closely based on the author’s own daughter who also shares the same addiction. The first book introduces Kristina’s tumultuous relationship with the ‘monster’ that she first encountered when she met a boy during her summer visit to her no-good father. It was during this phase that she discovered her alter-ego, Bree, when she was under the influence of the drug.

The second book follows up with Kristina’s attempt to rehabilitate herself from the drug and her journey towards recovery. Nevertheless, it failed miserably and she went back to her old ways, sinking even lower than before.

The last book is the most captivating because it was told from Kristina’s children’s POV, who described the psychological baggage that came with being born from an addict. This book left a powerful message and was worded very differently from the first two. Kristina’s roller coaster of a life as a mother was revealed in snippets by each child who had their own fair share of things to say about her.

Easily, this trilogy is my favourite YA series to read this year. I remember seeing Crank multiple times in bookstores but never bothered to pick it up (probably because it didn’t have a picture of a fucking vampire or some shit). I think it’s a little sad that I’ve only just discovered this book earlier this year because it could’ve been a much more enjoyable read if I’d been a teenager. However, I do have to caution that the overall ending will leave a bad taste in your mouth. To me, it’s all because of Kristina. She is the most infuriating main character I’ve ever encountered, to be honest. Still, loved it.

GoodReads link

The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath

I know, I’m very late to the party.

This book tells the story of Esther Greenwood who seemed to have her life all sorted out but was slowly descending into madness. Written from a first person POV, Esther described her mental state through crisp, monotonous monologues that sometimes came across as pretentious. However, the deeper you get into the book, the more you get used to it because you start to understand Esther’s thought process. The way she described her multiple suicide attempts were very blasé and that was quite unsettling to read, to be honest.

I won’t say I enjoyed the experience of reading the book but it was deeply moving to step into Esther’s mind and watch her spiral into madness. It’s one of those books that is undeniably great but will not be reread immediately after. It’s a heavy book and took me a while to finish because of its writing style. This book is swimming in issues that not most would want to talk about – especially women. As I’m typing this, I’m considering reading it again. Maybe I’ll go out and buy the physical copy for that ultimate satisfaction.

GoodReads


That’s that. Hasn’t been a great year for reading but better than the previous. Maybe I’ll use this as an opportunity to read more books. Strive to read 100. Be that overachiever I’ve always feared to be.

Or I could stick to online articles because that seems to be my reading fix.

We’ll see.

Mornings

Sprinkles of dew tickle my face.

Pleasant petrichor wafts through feathery palm leaves, and I breathe. Deep.

A gentle breeze brings about tiny whispers, sweet flowers kiss my skin.

Sunlight peeks through a curtain of misty weather,

a promise of never-ending summery sights

and I tremble with unquestionable excitement.

Hello, mornings. How I’ve missed you.

Play On

Play on, Mr. Piper,
play the songs of your calling,
the tempting lure, ensnaring from the most wicked
to the innocent.

Casualties mean nothing to the Piper,
when his music buries the unfortunate,
leaves them to rot, swimming with the earth dwellers that have long been abandoned,
as he prances with his instrument to a wider audience.

He dances, with enough grace and masculinity
to mask the deceit, he reeks of it.
His feet move to the hymns of solid promises, and trails of sugar sprinkle his steps.
Our knees buckle as we lick, tasting the sweetness he so graciously bestows upon,
in hopes of not being forgotten.

His horse neighs from the high heavens, where his throne sits.
As the sky above us remain murky, bearing pregnant clouds
with hot, humid rain escaping to singe our skin every sunrise to sunset.
But where he sits, lightning never strikes.

Or so he thinks.

His contentment leaves us unruffled,
despite the stacks of paper thin ego littering him.
“Let him play on”, Mother says.
For if he stops, the rain will follow,
And flowers will wither.
Nothing will grow.

So play on, Mr. Piper.
Play on.