“You’re saying that by setting an arbitrary time limit for yourself, you feel better about the choices you’re making now?”

How do I answer this?

More than anything, I hate that word.

Arbitrary. Based on random choice or personal whim.

I’d like to believe every principle I have – or have set for myself can be justified with a solid reason. It is not based on personal whim. It is not a ditzy thought I conjured up one day to excuse whatever action I did during the time. I would like to believe that. However it’s sad to admit I’ve fallen victim to hasty decisions and brittle self-promises, all constructed in an ~arbitrary~ fashion.

There goes that word again.

I should step back and analyse myself, understand what it is I am capable of and should be committed in before I chain another promise to my ankle. But if in the actual context, to answer that initial question; yes. But I have grown to accept this promise and live with this decision. I am taking this as a learning experience.

PS: Najwa Mahiaddin‘s rendition of Seri Mersing is hauntingly beautiful. I get chills listening to it.


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